What am looking for

Life's little pleasures also has its own little pains
some friends are worth more than treasures while others feel like an unwashable menstrual blood stain
personally, i have problems... 'sigh!'
In as much loving i am,i possess an icy heart
time-space seems to relove around,but am not part
i feel flacid inside, but turgid as a crystal on the outside
i tend to look for love, but crush out lyk a 8.5 seismic landslide
am cold in the inside
outer hotter than a steamer in its prime
i want to change,but my emotions always tend to sublime
when things give way, a solid cold heart is revitalised
I wish i were stronger,
i wish i loved longer
but in the end the truth is out for me to realise
there was a time i once loved
there was a time i once treasured
but now my heart has no mo space for love to capitalize

so my apologies if to you i was ever rude,
if i ever made you cry or ever sounded absurd
as human is to err, i guess my emotions went too far
am just trying to look for my love, but as friends maybe we would prosper